intothenew

Here I was happy and content to work things out myself. Then YOU come along, yes YOU, every last one of YOU.


I set down to research some simple issue a little over a year ago, and didn’t notice the force then. But it was there, slowly surrounding me, like a warm fog. Now I know, I’m here dripping in it now. Google, they give me this candy or doughnut or cookie or some internets thing so as to lead me back to YOU. It’s a conspiracy, and I’m here to tell all of those unaware to get out while you can. If you are aware, it’s just too late, unless you serve up a big enough spitball that the mods feel the urge to hit you outta da park.


YOU proceeded to suck me in with all of this eye candy, serious eye candy, high bandwidth eye candy, Better Homes and Gardens worthy eye candy. The IP’s, they are in on it too. Stay with your dial-up if you still have it, go back if you have the strength, the artsy-fartsy eye candy will be much less tempting.


YOU show me your fancy schmancy substrates, and pretend to argue amongst yourselves as to the validity of each. Therein lies the conscious ploy, to have me choose sides, take a stand, and dig my heels in even deeper. I should still be using river sand and garden soil, but it’s too late. If I would have just kept my shovel and laundry tub I would have been much better for it.


YOU are in cahoots with Plasticard and Plantilicious.com. Even the fancy schmancy substrates are not enough for YOU. Specialty flora must be rooted in every possible nook and cranny, with the intended purpose of of a self gratifying seltzer.


YOU really get me with this next one, there is even a forum just for it.(Dudley Dooright Does Aqua Art). Give me a break, if that don’t wake you up. Give some poor schmuck the dream that he can sell enough lemonade to fund a rimless tank, outfit it with all of the sleek gadgets, plant it with exotica, and get his name in lights. How much do you charge for the cups?


YOU even have the locals on your side. I walk into the LFS/Bird Cage/Gerbil Den/Lizard Emporium and get the question; Are you from “Planet of the Plants”? They are nice enough after that, offer me the latest in algae destroying snake oil(trying to numb my intellect), or the latest painted fauna(even more numbing on the intellect). YOU have them all in chorus on my final question at any of these encounters; “Do you have a supplier for aquatic plants?”. The answer is always; ”Ain’t nobody I know ever grown anything but Java Moss and algae”, knowing good and well that I would have to turn to Plantilicious. I caught on to this one after watching too many blow diet Coke through their nose when I left.


Run n00bs, run!


This from and old slate bottom that gots no more cause to lie.

Tex Gal

Oh the pleasure of ignorant bliss.....

davemonkey

I'll bet that anyone who gets to this thread is already hooked too deep. There's no escaping now. Addiction has a new name....and it's Planted Aquaria...AAAAAAHAHAHA....AAAAAAHAHAHA....

-Dave

wet

Having large quantities of white and dirty brown powders, a very nice scale, a couple syringes, and a bunch of zip lock bags around only helps the addiction, too.

niko

See! That's why I used to tell people "We, planted tank folk are a weird kind. Come to our meetings and you will meet a lot of weird people." Most people in this country don't like to associate with any kind of "weird" so I tried to play that. I was nice (and weird).

But lately I just say "Oh! We are all very nice and sociable folk! Come to the next meeting! Lots of free plants and bla bla bla". Why do I say that? Because if people don't get into things like planted tanks they fall in many other definitely unhealhty addictions - TV, sports watching, work, politics, to name a few. Also - if you have come close to planted tanks you will be hooked anyway.

InToTheNew, you can't deny we are nice and sociable folk. And that you could have many worst addictions.

See! It's all good! Tasty green Cool-Aid, eh?



--Nikolay

Seattle_Aquarist

Hi intothenew,
I Googled Plantilicious.com but no aquatic plants......bummer!

intothenew

Must be something wrong with the interwebs.

soler

LOL! That was hillarious. At least others have Dr. Phil and Oprah to help them work through their issues. There's no help for the aquatic plant people... lol.

Chris Noto

Noto's First Law, true for any and every they: "They are always up to something."

It appears that I was thinking about the same thing you were, only in the third person.

intothenew

Amateurs, pure amateurs.





This is a slimy bunch.